Role Reversal

It is nothing new that I write stories that feature a strong heroine. In my own life, I am a strong woman–very strong. Since my husband’s accident, I’ve also taken over many of “his” jobs.  That he realizes this is strange and good–not that he’s necessarily happy about all of it.

Protector. I first think of my husband as the one who defeats the intruder, but now it is my turn. There are some perks. He bought me two awesomely sweet pistols (I’ve wanted them since I first saw a picture!), and a scary good shotgun. I’ll never pretend to be Dirty Harry or a maniac leaping out with guns in both hands. More like a mama bear. With this responsibility of new firearms also comes learning about them, stopping capabilities, safety issues, and refining my shooting techniques.  Please, good weather, I want to do some target practice on our range. 

Caretaker. Instead of sharing the ranch and household chores, I’m pretty much it. If it breaks, I fix it (or hire someone). If it eats, I feed it. If it is dirty, I clean it.  This role has been shifted to me not so much from his accident but his work. His limited physical ability makes him tire faster and by the time he gets home, he’s spent. I do give him credit for trying so hard, and cooking some meals.

What I’m doing is nothing new to many women–they do it 24/7 with no relief. I’m in total awe of them. I accept what I’m given, knowing I’m getting stronger physically and emotionally. I’m loving what I can now bring to my heroines, and a hero who depends on his woman to rescue him.

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10 thoughts on “Role Reversal

  1. They say women are not only the ‘fairer’ sex, but the ‘weaker’ sex, too. I don’t believe it for a minute! In pioneer days the men would go off to hunt the game, but the women protected the homestead, birthed their babies, cooked, cleaned, raised the garden, sewed their clothes, took care of the livestock, oft times worked the fields and the list goes on and on.

    You have an awful lot on your plate, Meg. And somewhere in there you have to find time to write. I admire you and all that you do. Hang in there.

  2. Meg,

    I agree with you one hundred percent. Women have always risen to the occasion. We do what has to be done. We will divvy up the responsibilities, or shoulder them, whatever has to be done.

    I’m sure Don appreciates you taking care of things. I think it eases a strong man’s mind to know that YOU are one less thing he has to worry about. I sure want a shotgun. I’m just jealous. DH thinks I’d shoot him if I had one. spw

  3. You are, indeed, a strong woman, Meg, and I’m proud of you!

    Re the notions toward women, years ago my mom worked at a business owned by two men. She’d been there 12-14 years when they hired a man to do the same job (though less successfully; she had way more clients than he did). After a few months, they gave the man a raise to where he was making more than her.

    Mom went to the bosses and asked why, and their response was, “He has a family to take care of.”

    She stood there, open-mouthed, then very quietly pointed out that he had an infant and a wife who worked full-time, while SHE was a widow with three teenage daughters, one in college, and if that didn’t constitute a “family to take care of,” she didn’t know what did. To say nothing of bringing in triple the business he did.

    She walked out with an even bigger raise than he’d gotten.

    Weaker sex. Snort.

  4. We be women, hear us ROAR!

    Meg, you are so totally awesome! Strong, independent and more than capable. You have so much on your shoulders, dang. I would give you a big bear hug and some chocolate if I could. 😀 Keep on, keeping on. You’re an inspiration!!

  5. Hey Meggy!

    There’s nothing wrong with embracing your inner stud. It seems men like a strong woman who doesn’t have to be rescued all the time, as long as he can do the rescuing MOST of the time. 🙂

    Hope the DH gets back in tip top shape soon. I’m sure you could use a partner on the shooting range.

    RD

  6. Meg–to be honest, I’ve never had much respect for a woman who has to have a man “take” care of her. When both partners work, both should share the homestead chores. If one is injuried or ill, the other should step up to the plate and do what has to be done. We’re waaaay past the caveman days when division of work was gender based.

    You rock, girl!

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