No, I’m not anti-Christmas. What…miss out on presents and eating more chocolate?? This blog is all about people who deserve coal in their stockings. First, you have to understand that the older I get, the more like the cartoon character Maxine I become. Most of the time, when drivers do unacceptable things like when the lanes go from two to one and some yahoo speeds up to the end of the closing lane, then pushes his way in ahead of the rest of us who have been patiently awaiting their turn. And then there are the dummies who enable this behaviour by letting them get away with it.
The rest of the year, my “road rage” takes the form of wishing that when they leave their house the next morning that they will find all four tires flat. I never wish a flat tire on someone driving; I want to inconvenience them, not kill them and other drivers. But in December, I’m filled with Christmas spirit, so instead of wishing for flat tires, I wish that Santa will fill their stockings with a lump of coal for each offense they’ve committed against someone during the year.
So, to all drivers who drive like they own the road, a lump of coal. To all contest judges who judge harshly or unfairly, a lump of coal. To every parent who has lied to or disappointed their child, a lump of coal. To all idiot politicians who make campaign promises they KNOW they have no hope in Hades of keeping, a lump of coal and one they have to pay for, not with our taxes.
To all those people who are so wrapped up in themselves that they hurt feelings, make someone else feel unworthy, lie, bully, ignore, and generally are unpleasant to be around, a lump of coal. For New Year’s, we’ll go back to four flat tires.
To all of you who fit this description, a Bah, Humbug to you!